i looked at myself for a long time for the first time in a while. all i noticed were my eyebags. they're so deep and so fucking dark. i'm not okay. i don't think i'll ever find a boyfriend. or anybody who loves me. i genuinely look at myself like the worst person on earth. i think i'm fucking disgusting. i wish i was dead. i hate relationships, i hate love, i hate sex, i hate everything. i want to just go to sleep forever and never wake up.